Happiness is a state of mind… easy to say, difficult to do, isn’t it?
Actually according to psychologists, happiness is one of the positive feelings that are always present in a healthy psychologically functioning person. And I do generally agree with it, however isn’t the intend to be happy as long as it is possible- meaning to push away, press down, avoid all negative feelings or influences that may impact our mood, way of thinking or behaving so that we get our of the happy state of mind.
And this is possible by developing and sustaining the inner happiness. The state or place within ourselves/ our mind so that we can have an access to it 24/7, no matter what.
Inner happiness means not dwelling on the past or worrying about the future. Ok, but how so we get there? We need to figure out what makes us dwell on the past or worry about the future- is it because our mind has a tendency to not stay put or it goes all over the place? How to deliberately slow it down so it can focus on the present?
People slip into the unhappiness state almost unconsciously when they think about something in the past that upset or hurt them. We all try to think over what happened, or why it happened- but unfortunately it doesn’t do a good thing to us, as on one hand it is already the past that can be changed/ unspoken. Only sometimes it is good to go over sth once more just to discover what can be learned, but then you have to move on! The past is over and there’s nothing you can do to change it.
Pretty much the same goes for the future. It’s one thing to excitedly plan and anticipate an event, or even to spend a little time going over what could go wrong so you are prepared with “Plan B.” But to spend time thinking of elaborate scenarios and how to overcome them is just a waste of time. Your time is valuable and you could (and should) be spending it enjoying your life.
I often praise with my customers “worse happens” scenario, where they need to tell me what is the worse that could happen in this particular situation. Then we go with accepting it and then once this situation appears and not the worse happens it is a good situation, good day, happy day